Ask Amy: Anti-social son-in-law taxes family’s patience
Seeking justice could inspire other survivors to come forward.
Dear Amy: “Passively Helpful Guy” wondered about offering to help people.
Your suggestion of, "Can I give you a hand with that?" is the perfect response.
It lets the person know you're available and willing, without pouncing.
I have a visible physical atypicality (I avoid the word disabled) and well-meaning people often jump in to "help" me with things I manage fine, but differently.
It doesn't occur to them that they're stealing bits of my hard-won autonomy, or are looking for a pat-on-the-back experience to brighten their day.
Always ask before helping anyone, unless they're bleeding or lying on the sidewalk, babbling and/or unconscious!
– No Thanks, I’ve Got It
Dear I’ve Got It: Sage advice. Thank you.
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
©2024 Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
