Life Advice
/Health
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Erika Ettin: Don't text your ex 'Happy Birthday'
Your ex’s birthday is coming up, and you’re sitting there with your phone in hand, debating whether to send that little “Happy Birthday” text ... and, of course, which emoji to go with it. It seems harmless, right? Maybe even polite. And I get it. You want to show that you still care and remember the important things.
But, often, the ...Read more
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Ask Anna: My partner is always on their phone -- am I being needy?
Dear Anna,
I'm a 29-year-old bisexual woman. My girlfriend (30) and I have been together for almost two years, and we recently moved in together. I love her deeply, but I’ve noticed that she’s always on her phone — whether we’re watching TV, having dinner or just hanging out in bed. I’ve tried to brush it off, telling myself it's no ...Read more
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Situationships… How and why?
Ah, the situationship—the modern-day romantic limbo that leaves many of us scratching our heads, wondering, “What are we?” If you’ve ever found yourself in this ambiguous gray area, you’re not alone. Situationships have become increasingly common in today’s dating world (were they always, and now there’s just a name for it?), where...Read more
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My best friend is 30 years my senior. Here's what she's taught me about life
LOS ANGELES -- She was 63.
I was 33.
We shared cocktails at a rooftop bar overlooking Sunset Boulevard during golden hour. And the connection was palpable.
No, this isn't the start to an "L.A. Affairs" romance column. But it is about a love affair of sorts. My best girlfriend of the last two decades is 30 years older than me.
I met Loraine ...Read more
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How do you make friends outside your generation? These people share how they did it
LOS ANGELES -- On a bench near the Santa Monica Farmer's Market in July, Peggy Cheng recalled the time a television writer pitched her a wacky sitcom centered around the unlikely scenario of a young woman who had befriended her elderly neighbors.
Cheng, who was working in TV development at the time, wasn't impressed.
"She thought it was so ...Read more
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Is ChatGPT an online dating lifesaver or hinderance?
By now, we’ve all probably experimented with AI tools like ChatGPT — maybe to help us write an essay or outline for work, to help us plan a vacation, or maybe just for fun to see what kind of answers would come up to silly questions while sitting around with friends. But it recently came to my attention that some are turning to chatbots for ...Read more
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Ask Anna: What counts as flirting on social media?
Dear Anna,
I’m a bisexual woman, married to another woman. We’ve been together for four years and things are generally good. The big issue is that my wife works as a photographer, and she’s constantly shooting with attractive models, which I totally get and I'm cool with. But here's the thing — every few months, there's a new model she'...Read more
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Is Bumble's 'Opening Move' feature a good thing?
Earlier this year, Bumble unveiled a new feature dubbed “Opening Moves.” While the popular online dating app previously stood out for only letting women send the first message after a match, the update allows female users to set a question, either from Bumble's preset examples or their own idea, for matches to respond to. For example: “Who...Read more
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Ask Anna: WFH wardrobe clashes and when to stop replying on dating apps
Dear Anna,
I’ve been working from home for the past year, and like a lot of people, my go-to attire has been pretty relaxed — think joggers, comfy tees and sometimes even PJs if I’m being honest. It’s been a huge adjustment, but I’ve loved the comfort of dressing casually while working from my home office. Recently, though, my ...Read more
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Ask Anna: My married co-worker kissed me. Do I need to tell HR?
Dear Anna,
I’m a 25-year-old guy, and a situation at work is making me really uncomfortable. An older, married co-worker recently kissed me and has been dropping hints that she wants to take things further and have an affair. I know I shouldn’t have let that kiss happen. It was dumb and I was caught off guard. I’ve been cheated on in the ...Read more
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You don't have a crystal ball… neither does your partner
I field dating questions every week on Instagram on what I’ve dubbed “Ask Erika Monday,” and I recently received a common one that I’ve gotten variations of over and over again. The person asked, “6-7 dates. Everything is going great. I feel I need to know what he wants for our future. Too soon?”
I certainly understand where this is...Read more
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Life got in the way, and I ghosted someone. How late is too late for redemption?
There’s not much worse than the feeling of being ghosted when online dating. (For the uninitiated, consider yourself lucky, but “ghosting” is when someone you’ve been chatting with or seeing completely disappears on you without warning — no “nice meeting you but I don’t see a connection” text or anything. Just stops responding ...Read more
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Ask Anna: How to tell if you like someone or just admire them
Dear Anna,
I need advice. I’m on the spectrum but unsure if my problem is related to my autism. Since I was a child, I've struggled to distinguish between strong admiration and romantic crushes. Often, I develop obsessive feelings for someone based on their exceptional skills in a field I'm interested in — like music or gaming. I don't ...Read more
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Ask Anna: Can you be friends with someone you once had romantic feelings for?
Dear Anna,
My boyfriend (26M) is still friends with a woman (25F) he had feelings for a few years ago. They never dated or had any physical relationship, and he insists those feelings are long gone. I asked him to unfollow her on social media because I believe in cutting ties with past romantic interests. This is a personal boundary for me, and...Read more
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My date suggested a restaurant I can't afford -- What do I do?
There’s so much to stress about when it comes to a first date — what to wear, what conversation topics to avoid, if you’re about to get catfished — that another big obstacle is often overlooked: the financial aspect of dating. Even grabbing drinks a few times a week can really add up over time, and the last thing you want is to turn down...Read more
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More couples are hiring wedding content creators, so they and their guests can 'live in the moment'
PHILADELPHIA — In the car on the way home from her wedding, Bayley Shanley's phone pinged with a notification from one of her vendors.
As her new husband drove, Shanley flipped through more than 500 candid photos and videos.
She watched her bridesmaids walk down the aisle, a moment she had missed, and relived the speeches. She sent her ...Read more
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How much time should you spend on dating apps? You might be surprised
If you have screen time alerts on your phone, you already know that you probably spend more time than you are really willing to admit looking at that device. And if you’re anything like the rest of the population (or just me? Can’t be just me), much more of that time is spent browsing Instagram or playing sudoku than making phone calls or ...Read more
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Ask Anna: How do I address my disability on dating apps?
Dear Anna,
I'm a 28-year-old straight man living with an invisible disability — I have epilepsy. I've recently started using dating apps again after taking a break, and I'm unsure how to address my disability in my profile and conversations. I want to be open, but I'm worried about being judged or overlooked because of my condition. How ...Read more
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Ask Anna: Cheating technicalities and when a boyfriend crashes friend time
Dear Anna,
I recently discovered that my girlfriend has been using a dating app. Not to make friends. Not even for hookups, but to find a new partner. We're not in an open relationship, and I made it clear from the start that I wouldn't tolerate cheating. When I confronted her, she admitted to having the profile but argued she wasn't cheating ...Read more
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Shared values vs. shared timing – Which is more important?
Question: “Any advice about anxiety around turning 40? I want kids and a partner. I don’t have either right now.”
I get questions like this all the time. And trust me—I get it. It can feel overwhelming when you know you have a certain goal in mind but haven’t had the results you’re looking for yet (and might see all your friends ...Read more
Popular Stories
- Ask Anna: My partner is always on their phone -- am I being needy?
- My best friend is 30 years my senior. Here's what she's taught me about life
- Ask Anna: My married co-worker kissed me. Do I need to tell HR?
- How do you make friends outside your generation? These people share how they did it
- Erika Ettin: Don't text your ex 'Happy Birthday'