What is the 'shadow self' and why is everyone talking about their hidden desires?

So, we're born with all kinds of potential and in the course of growing up and developing a healthy, functioning ego, we find there are parts of ourselves that we have to push aside. This is normal. It's necessary. It's healthy. It happens to all of us. Some of what gets relegated to the shadow is stuff that really might cause a problem in a collective society like aggression or greed. But also a lot of what gets pushed into the shadow might be more constructive.

What are some ways to identify what's in our shadow?

In every family there is usually something that you are not supposed to be. In some families you are absolutely not supposed to be lazy and if you wind up sitting around watching TV that is the worst thing and it means that you're lazy. Other families you might not be allowed to be impractical or whimsical. In my family you were not allowed to be immodest or boastful. If you're wondering about your shadow, it can be helpful to ask yourself what was the one thing you were not allowed to be in your family. That will often be a clue to what might be in your shadow.

Why is it useful to examine one's shadow?

When shadow is totally unconscious we tend to project it. When you feel really hot outrage at someone else, you need to ask yourself: "Where is that in me? What's that about internally?"

The other reason that it's helpful to do shadow work is that a lot of what is in the shadow is actually full of vitality and energy that we can use in service to life and growth. Jung reportedly said once that 99% of the shadow is pure gold.

To use myself as an example, I was like, "I can't seek center stage, I can't look for attention, I have to be very modest." But when I got over myself a little bit and did my shadow work, my ability to put myself out there has proven to be very vivifying and enlivening and it has helped me in my career.

How does one embark on shadow work?

The first answer to that is to get curious about what's in shadow. Notice what gets you really hot. When do you have an outsized reaction of outrage to someone or something? When do you notice that sense of self-righteousness and that huge inflation that comes with being just and on the right side of history? It might be good to say, "Hmm. Wait a second. Who am I hating on right now? And where might that be in me?"

And then just continuing to be open to that. Where might we be a little greedy, a little selfish? Where might we be behaving in shadowy ways?

Why do you think this idea is resonating so strongly right now?

I think that Jung's ideas have a perennial quality. They always return and with renewed freshness and interest. I definitely think "The Shadow Work Journal" helped it initially, but why did it catch fire? Why did it explode in the public imagination?

I think people appreciate Jung's ideas and return to them because they sense that there is just an inherent truth in it.

As a Jungian analyst who has gone through years of training, does it worry you at all to see these ideas floating around social media?

Jung said our ability to do this work could make the difference between whether or not the human race survives. And given how polarized we are, I don't know that I disagree with that. So in a way, it's very gratifying to hear that this kind of language is permeating social media.

But I know that things can get flattened and oversimplified and changed on social media so I'm not without some concern about it. One of my concerns is the idea that shadow work is something you can do and be done with. That's not the way it works. You're always working on shadow — you can't make it go away. What you can do is strive to be more conscious of it.