Ask Amy: Young son worries about growing up
Dear Amy: My husband and I have a very sweet 8-year-old son. His dad and I adore him. We’re having a great time going through life together.
Recently he has been emotional and sensitive. He has said several times that he doesn’t want to grow up. When I ask him why, he says he’ll miss all of the things we do together, like reading together before bed and cuddling with us, and doing “little boy things.”
I don’t know if I should be concerned about this, or even how to respond.
Any suggestions?
– Concerned Mom
Dear Concerned: This is a fairly common phase for children at this age, especially for sensitive and expressive kids like your son.
Some children going through this phase will ask their parents, “When I grow up, can I marry you?” This reflects their strong and loving attachment.
I remember going through this phase as a child, telling my mother that I was never going to move away from home. (As an adult, I believe this prospect would not have been on my mother’s wish list.)
I recall her response as being kind and reassuring.
Heading into adolescence can be a pretty scary prospect. Hormonally, socially, and intellectually your son is sailing into choppy waters, and even if he doesn’t know what’s ahead, on a deep level – he understands that change is on the horizon.
...continued
