Child victim faces abuser at family events
In the meantime, yes, definitely avoid him.
If I were your sister, I would flank you at any family events. If he wanted to hug you, he'd have to get through me first.
Dear Amy: My wife and I have been married for 20 years. We are empty nesters. I have just realized that I am unhappy in the relationship. I am an outgoing person, and have always had outside interests and friends.
Slowly, over time, I gave up my interests to please my wife, who has no friends, nearby family or outside interests. She does not have a job.
I always felt guilty doing outside activities. She also passively added to the guilt by bringing up chores that I am forgoing by going out.
In the beginning, she was more outgoing, positive and had career plans, but over time those have all gone by the wayside.
She's negative and uses nagging health issues as an excuse not to get a job or find new interests or friends. If I bring it up, we fight, so we have not discussed this in several years.
Being in our 50s, I feel we're too old to make any changes in the relationship. The sex life is tepid. I could leave, but would worry about her mental status, considering her lack of a support system or job prospects/experience. Outside of having affairs, what can I do?
-- At a Dead End
Dear Dead End: Your wife sounds depressed, and rather than you being able to successfully inspire her to work on her own issues, her situation has pulled you down.
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