Weekend Update anchors Colin Jost and Michael Che tackle the week's biggest news, like Trump promising a "Golden Age of America" in his presidential victory speech.

David Gilmour talks about getting rave reviews for his album Luck and Strange, working with his whole family on the album and the rumor that The Dark Side of the Moon was written to synchronize with The Wizard of Oz movie.

Two guys were discussing life in general over drinks one night.

"My grandfather lived to be 96."

"Ninety-six? What finally got him?"

"Liquor and women."

"Well, that just goes to show ya," snickered the one guy, "both ...Read More

Mom goes to son's room to wake him up. "Okay, son, time to wake up! Time for school!"

Son, in a surly mood says, "I don't want to go to school!"

Mother insists, "You must, son, now come on!"

Son replies, "I don't want ...Read More

A guy walks into a dentist's office and flops right down on the couch.

"Doc", he says, "Here's the problem. I think I'm a moth"

"Well", says the doctor, "That certainly is a problem, but why did you come into a dentist's...Read More

A man died and went to The Judgment. St. Peter met him at the Gates of Heaven and said, "Before you meet with God, I thought I should tell you -- we've looked at your life, and you really didn't do anything particularly ...Read More