- When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other.

- During your initial consultation, he tries to sell you Amway.

- He tells you that his last good case was a "Budweiser."

- During the trial you ...Read More

Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the doctor, “Why do you want to join the Navy, son?”

“My father said it'd be a good idea, sir.”

“Oh? And what does your father do?”

“He's in the Army...

On the Listening Tour, a prominent politician was pleased and proud that the local sandwich shop in a town he was visiting had named a sandwich after him.

He was somewhat less pleased after he found out what was in it.

...Read More

The old man had died. A wonderful funeral was in progress and the country preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased, what an honest man he was, and what a loving husband and kind father he was.

Finally,...Read More

A grocer put up a sign that read "Eggplants, 25 each -- three for a dollar."

All day long, customers came in exclaiming: "Don't be ridiculous! I should get four for a dollar!"

Meekly the grocer capitulated and packaged ...Read More

-- Aquarium: interactive television for cats.

-- Cataclysm: any great upheaval in a cat's life.

-- Catatonic: a feline medicinal drink.

-- Caterpillar: a soft scratching post for a cat.

-- Cat Scan: to look for a new ...Read More