A few weeks after Adam passed away, a woman came up to me after one of the Broadway shows and said, in front of a whole bunch of other people, "Do you think your show would be better if your director was still alive?" But the funny thing is, if you think about it, it's not a cruel thing to say. The answer is undoubtedly, yes. He was my collaborator, and I loved him, and he made my shows better.

Q: Have you ever heard from anyone who also attended that meeting?

A: Not a single person. I thought I saw one of them in Union Square a few years later, but I didn't want to go up to somebody like, "You look just like this person from this meeting of white nationalists in Queens!" By then, I realized that I had lost their faces and I couldn't pick any of them out of a lineup. I don't know if they've ever seen the show, or if they're aware of it. If they do see it, I hope they like it.

By the way, the show is not a think piece about white nationalism. I've said no to so many counter-terrorism panels! No, I went to this thing one time and followed them on Gab [a social network used by the far-right]. I'm not some expert on this.

Q: What's the most difficult part of the show to perform, whether technically or emotionally?

A: There's a deep emotional pause that [creative consultant and the special's director] Alex Timbers encouraged me to take. In that moment, I feel all of the feelings, all of the joys of performing the show, all the loss of the people that aren't around anymore. Some nights I can just get through it easy, some nights I feel like crying. That part's hard. People were like, "God, you're really acting there," and I'm like, "No, I'm sad." Part of the reason this show is ending is because I can't do it anymore. Doing it can be a wrenching experience, but I've loved it. I'm lucky to have good friends who buoy me through the more stressful times.

And from a technical perspective, the Christmas story. It's very fun to do. It's my favorite bit, but it's extremely high energy; it's gotta balance fast and slow and it's unlike anything I've ever done before. Adam always said it was his favorite piece of stand-up he's ever worked on. He and I really kneaded it to make it the funniest part. But, gosh, it can be challenging, and if I take my eye off the ball, it all unravels.

Q: I love when you announce to the audience, "I'm only telling you stuff I think you'd enjoy. If you really knew me, you might not like me." Why include that?

A: It's about performance. The show is based on this real-life story, but I think it's made so much better by the fact that there is artistic license, which I've always been really comfortable with. Because truly, the curatorial decisions that you make as a comedian are artistic licenses. Your biases, your prejudices, they always show, and examining those is what makes it interesting.

Like, what if I have opinions on complex political issues, or the way that people should move in the world? Would I still be afforded the same level of empathy that I get from an audience? I have a line in the show that isn't in the special because it's one of those things that just belongs in the live show. I say, "I could lose half of you with one line about Israel right now, the other half with two."

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