Invasion of the Hornet Snatchers
I discovered the squatters when I was outside watering the flowers on our front porch. I heard a slight buzzing sound, and since I wasn't asleep, I knew it wasn't me snoring. Suddenly, there was a fly-by buzz over my head, and when I followed the path of the buzzee, my eyes landed on a wasp nest, roughly the size of Rhode Island, under the portico above the front door.
I assessed the situation and then, like any rational city-turned-suburban-turned-rural woman, dropped my watering can and ran screaming into the house.
"I think I know why we haven't received any of our packages recently," I said to my husband over the phone.
"Why is that?" he asked.
"Because there is a wasp condominium over our front door."
"If they're not paying HOA fees, then they have to leave," he said.
"How do we get them to do that?" I asked.
"Call the pest control people and get them to come over and get rid of it."
To me, the nest looked pretty big, but you know you really have a substantially sized wasp nest when the pest control person takes one look at your nest, steps back and says, "Whoa!"
"Those are hornets," he said, ducking down as one of said hornets emerged from a hole in the mothership.
...continued
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