A group of young children were sitting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions.

"Davey, what sound does a cow make?"
Davey replied, "It goes 'moo'."

"Alice, what sound...Read More

Lars asked Ole, "Do ya know da difference between a Norvegian and a canoe?"

"No, I don't," said Ole.

"A canoe will sometimes tip," explained Lars.

- Always give 100% at work - 12% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 20% Thursday, 5% Friday

- For Sale - Iraqi rifle. Never fired. Dropped once.

- One good thing about Alzheimer's is you get to meet new people every day...Read More

"I reckon I'll have me a half-caf double latte with a twist. IN A DIRTY MUG!"

"Gentlemen, rather than get caught up in mindless reaction, let's draw upon our feminine selves for a more intuitive solution."

"Can we ...Read More

I decided to stop worrying about my teenage son's driving and take advantage of it.

I got one of those bumper stickers that say, "How's my driving?" and put a 900 number on it.

"At 50 cents a call, I've been making $38...Read More

Don talks about Trump being inaugurated on MLK Day, evacuating during the fires, having to tell Anthony Anderson that he needs to evacuate, his new wrestling movie Unstoppable, and Jimmy shows an amazing old clip of Don ...Read More