... continued from above

I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac.

I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar.

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing!

I.R.S.: We've got what it takes to take what you've ...Read More

A woman went to a Florida lemon grove to apply for a job, but the foreman thought she seemed way too qualified for the position. "Do you even have any actual experience picking lemons?" he asked.

"Well, I think I do." she...Read More

A young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss the use of the car. His father took him to his study and said to him, "I'll make a deal with you. You bring ...Read More

A doctor started an affair with his nurse. Shortly after this started, she announced that she was pregnant.

Not wanting his wife to find out, he gave her a large amount on money and asked her to go out of the country, ...Read More

Seven months pregnant, my hand on my aching back, I stood in line at the post office for what seemed an eternity.

"Honey," said a woman behind me, "I had back pain during my pregnancy. I was bedridden for four months ...Read More

... continued from above

Jack Kevorkian for White House physician.

Just say no! to sex with pro-lifers.

My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her ...or something like that.

Sure you can trust the government! Just...Read More