Housewife: "How did you know I was home? My son told you I was out"

Salesman: "It was easy Lady. He was mowing the lawn."

... continued from above

Answer the phone. As soon as you realize it is a Telemarketer, set the receiver down, scream, “OH MY GOSH!” and then hang up.

Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask if he/...Read More

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.

Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens...Read More

An engineer dies and reports to hell.

Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements.

After a while, they've got air conditioning and flush ...Read More

The other day, Nancy and I got into some petty argument. (I say it was petty. She would have said it was Armageddon.) As is our nature, neither of us would admit the possibility that we might be in error.

To her credit, ...Read More

Morgan Spector talks about the time he thought he was making his late-night debut while tripping out at a county fair, starring in The Gilded Age and launching his acting career in the Broadway play A View From the Bridge ...Read More