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"Today President Bush had a meeting with Russian President Vladimir Putin. The meeting had two translators, and they still had a rough time. Mainly trying to figure out the translation for "okie dokie." --Conan O'Brien

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"According to a new medical study, it's healthy for a wife to get angry at her husband than to keep it all inside which can lead to disease. So guys when the wife runs you over with the SUV, she's just trying to live a healthier lifestyle." --Jay Leno

 

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"Running...people think running is a sport. Running isn't a sport because anyone can do it. Anything we can all do can't be a sport. I can run, you can run. My mother can run...you don't see her on the cover of Sports Illustrated, do you?" --George Carlin


 

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